She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
