We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize