Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize
