well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize