ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Randomize
