It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
