It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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