I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I wish my penis had an off switch
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize
