this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize