I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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