I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
