I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize