our cab driver is having phone sex.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
