His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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