im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Randomize
