I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
