No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
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