okay pat passed out under dana's car
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Randomize