:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize
