I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
