There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
