there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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