And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
