If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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