if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize