Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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