Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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