are you so shy because you have an std?
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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