...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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