i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
this boner is exhausting
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
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