this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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