He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
