i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
That was before I lit my hair on fire
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
