Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Randomize
