Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
