I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Never let your siblings swipe right.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Randomize
