He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
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Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
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Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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