do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
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