Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Randomize
