God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
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The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
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I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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