I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
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