i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Randomize
