Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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