so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
