he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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