Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
