The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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