U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
