bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize