I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
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