I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Randomize
