new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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